Integrating coaching models as part of my coaching practice by Epimetheus
I’ve always believed that somewhere in a person’s experience there is something that they can use to look at a current problem and use their experience to solve that problem. And my experience shows me that, very often, that person has forgotten or discounted their experience and have built up the issue they face into a problem in their mind. And if they really don’t know (someone said to me that ‘you don’t know what you don’t know’, which is true), then they probably know someone they can go to for an answer- so even indirectly they have a answer within them self.
I was surprised then to learn that ‘solution-focussed’ (SF) coaching was a specific coaching approach with its own principles and approaches (and further amazed that it’s built upon NLP which I’ll describe further). I was even more surprised to learn that I, unwittingly, had been following a number of those approaches with positive outcomes for my clients. So this blog will take a different direction to my previous pieces and look at what solution-focussed coaching is, and then NLP, how it works and how having a bit of theory behind someone’s coaching can help improve their coaching (and mentoring).
Solution focused coaching (SF)
There are two fundamental assumptions in SF coaching.
The first is that it’s the way the client and the coach think about the issue that turns the issue into a problem.
Second is that the client has all the elements they need to create a solution to their problem; they are resourceful and don’t need to be treated as if they are lacking something or are in need of help.
This may sound a bit odd, because, after all, surely they have come to you as coach looking for help? Well, yes, they have. But the aim of the coach is to have an outcome where the client knows they have got what they came for and they have got there more-or-less under their own steam.
The way the coach coaches their client to do this involves a number of positive actions on the coach’s part.
Firstly, the coach sets out to focus on the outcome and how that could be achieved, and not by concentrating on how the problem arose. “Here it is, it is what it is, so how can we deal with it?”
Secondly, the relationship between coach and client is one of equals; the client is the expert in their issue and their life, the coach is privileged to be allowed to see and hear about it and to be in a position where their client can open up and discuss the issue without fear of any repercussions.
Thirdly the coach is in a position to ask questions from a neutral observer perspective aimed at encouraging their client to think about their issue in a different way; “how do you think others would see this?” “What would ….. (insert name of someone the client admires) do in this situation?” “Could you adapt that so that it suits you?” “Imagine…” are just some of the question the coach might ask. {I was once told that ‘imagine…?’ was one of the most liberating questions you could be asked.)
And fourthly, could the client experiment to find out what works and what does not? Einstein is supposed to have defined madness as expecting to do things the same way and expect to get different results.
At the core of this is the coach’s refusal to ‘buy the problem’. They listen and listen, seeking the glimmer of an idea from their client by holding an attitude of intelligent curiosity, an ide of service to their client and of facilitation, allowing the coach, and thus their client, to be able to focus relentlessly on the solution, not the problem.
Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP)
I was then later introduced to Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) by a course offered by the FDA (one of the UK’s Civil Service trade unions. According to the NLP Academy, “NLP is the practice of understanding how people organise their thinking, feeling, language and behaviour to produce the results they do.” However, according to Wikipedia, there is no scientific evidence to support the claims made by its proponent. But the ideas and practices of NLP made sense to me. I was reminded of the development of people’s understanding of physics. Newton’s laws ruled supreme until they were shown to work only in certain circumstances by Einstein’s Theory of Relativity. Yet Newton’s laws were good enough to get men to the Moon and back. Maybe the theory behind NLP is wrong but its practical use is still effective.
Let me share some of the practical value of NLP to coaching and mentoring, that leads to a number of practical coaching/mentoring techniques that work well (I’ve taken these from Chapter 13 of the ‘Complete Handbook of Coaching’ 3rd Edn)
Perception of reality and reality itself: The first presupposition of NLP is that ‘the map is not the territory’; the way a person perceives the world refers to reality but is a result of how they interpret the information they receive through their senses. This underpins the first fundamental assumptions in SF, and that perception is not how the world is. For example, the same piece of music (essentially, rapid pressure variations in the air) will be described in different ways by two people standing next to each other- their description and experience are filtered through their past experiences and interpreted differently; one is moved to tears, the other covers their ears and screws their eyes shut. And that reaction will have been primed by their existing belief about how they would react. How might those two people react to each other? They may possibly never bother to get to know the other because ‘they are not like me’. Their past experience may preclude them from ever venturing to try something new, and that person’s reaction and subsequent decision will have a perfectly sensible reason behind it for that person. Neither is ‘right’ or ‘wrong’, just different.
Resourcefulness: The presupposition that people already have their own solutions within themselves. This aligns with the second fundamental assumption in SF coaching, as it starts from the position that the client can tap into their previous experience to help them overcome their current issues.
Matching & Pacing: Observing the body language and physical gestures of our client, and the nature and tone of the opening conversation, a coach can reflect these back with similar patterns to build rapport. A cynic might regard that as manipulation, but the coach’s intention is always to the benefit of their client. Rapid establishment of rapport speeds the coaching process towards the client’s achieving their desired goal.
Using metaphors: Presuming that the client’s view of the world, as mediated through their senses, leads to their given reaction, conclusions and behaviour, it could be beneficial to let the client experience the world in a different way. Creating a new image, texture or description of their problem could help them see, hear or feel it in a different way. And this could lead them to perceive their issue differently and so lead them out of their maze to find a solution they could never have thought about before.
Anchoring: certain sights, sounds, smells or tastes evoke certain responses, either good or bad (the sound of one person’s voice always winds someone up, or a scent immediately makes them tense). Those reactions and the subsequent actions and behaviours of the client have become automatic, and maybe unconsciously so. Getting to the root allows the coach to help the client become aware of their own reaction. And once that has been established, the client can come to take control of this and start to think, then react, differently. So the client can consciously evoke a positive response to a perceived negative situation.
Framing and reframing: This is derived from the idea that all actions have, behind them, a positive intent: consider a statement of the client that has negative connotations and restate it in a way that it has positive intent. For example. ‘I am hopeless’ gets reflected back that the client ‘has high professional standards and so is starting from a good place to improve’. This helps to change the client’s perception, to change their ‘map of the world’, and come to a new perspective with different subsequent behaviour.
Continuing my professional and personal development
As a coach and mentor, I believe that it’s important to have a certain level of self-awareness of how one practices and knowing what principles can drive how you interact with others. Some things, with a little curiosity and self-exploration, can be validated by a wider community who have made similar observations and have been able to commit their energy and resources to develop further. As I’ve shared in this short blog there is much more to both SF and NLP. What’s been most useful, as I continue with my own development is integrating relevant theoretical frameworks, which comes with a lot of practical ideas about technique, into my coaching approach and this has helped me improve my coaching practice.
Read other posts by Epimetheus published on the good coach.
